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Everyday

Posted on April 01 2015

I have always been a very happy, energetic, athletic person up until I had my first child a beautiful little girl at the age of 30. Don't get me wrong, she is my first gift and I love her with all my heart. Shortly after having her I was tired all the time. I would always sleep, especially when she slept. I developed anxiety and depression and weight.. I couldn't understand because this was the best time of my life. I went to several doctors and no answer. Finally I was diagnosed with Hypothyroid, apparently this happens sometimes to a woman after child birth. Once I was on medications I began t o feel better. Three years later I had my second child a little boy, I was so happy. Then months later as my baby boy got bigger, I noticed I couldn't hold him for long, swelling joints, dry mouth. I was so depressed. I cried every day. Finally my doctor told me to see a rheumatologist. I did and finally I was diagnosed with RA/Lupus and Sjogrens disease. I suffered for years trying all types of meds. I have been on and off prednisone. I struggle daily and am not always able to join in activities. I try so hard to see the good in everything and I know there are others who are worse off. My family and friends are very supportive and understanding but I have days when I cant get out of bed and days I don't want to ,but I do for my family. I try so hard to be positive and I cant always make plans because who knows how I will feel one day to the next. Its hard because people don't see the pain you carry inside, they don't know. People with autoimmune diseases suffer alone sometimes and silently just so we aren't always complaining or perceived as a hypochondriac. Its hard, everday and I have dealt with this for 15 years and still am, but I still thank God for every day I am alive to share with my family and friends.

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